Sweet Dreams, My Love
by FireAndIceCollide
Summary: A tiny one-shot in which Merlin and Morgana reflect on their relationship. Takes place after the Sweet Dreams episode from Season 2.


**_AN: _**_I do _**_NOT _**_own Merlin or any of its characters. All rights go to BBC and whoever else it belongs to. Just not me. Sad face._

_Reviews are welcome *cough cough hint hint*._

_They had seen him._

The only option was to run. Merlin ran, trying not to puff too loudly as he raced down the hall. The clack of armor was getting closer, rounding the corner behind him. He skidded around a bend in the wall and vaulted into a tiny niche, flattening himself against the palace stone. He held his breath and waited as the three fully-armored guards charged by his hiding place, searching for the intruder they had spotted.

When the sound of their running feet faded, he let out the breath he had been holding. He didn't think they had seen his face - he would be in very serious peril if they had.

Calming his heart rate and mopping up most of his light sweat with a few whispered words, Merlin stepped out into the hall. His step quickened down to its end, where he turned right. The guards usually stationed at the entrance had ran to join the ones that had been chasing Merlin - which was the general idea of letting himself be seen. He didn't do it for the sprinting practice, after all.

He took the stairs two at a time, anticipation growing in his stomach. He had looked forward to this all day - a time where he could be himself and not pretend for anybody. His errand was precious, to him.

He ducked inside, glancing around just to make sure before shutting the heavy oak doors behind him. The torches gave off a soft glow, being much smaller and set farther apart then they were in the halls he had just left. It was quiet, not even the sound of a mouse scampering reaching his ears. He gave another look around, just to be certain, and continued purposefully to the door he wanted.

He pushed the lever down, but didn't open it. Instead, he let it go and waited.

It cracked open, a tiny sliver of shadow falling over the floor. From behind the crack, a bright blue-green eye peered out for a second, before moving away from the door. "Come in." the smooth voice whispered, joy obvious in its tone.

With that, he entered the Lady Morgana's chambers, genuinely smiling for the first time all day.

**_XXX_**

Morgana smiled back, lightly tugging her dressing gown up over her shoulder. She took a step closer to Merlin and leaned her head against his chest, resting her elbows on his shoulders, lacing her fingers behind his neck. He hugged her, forever gentle, always so careful, as if she were made of glass. "How is Arthur?" she said quietly.

Merlin sighed. The events of the day had left him bone-tired. "Recovering from the effects of the spell. He'll be alright. I'm just glad Olaf didn't kill him." Merlin replied.

Morgana was silent for a moment before he heard the beginnings of laughter coming from his arms. "Did you see Olaf's face when Arthur declaimed his love for Vivian?"

Merlin couldn't help but smile, not just at the memory, but at Morgana's laughter. "If he hadn't have also been challenging Arthur to a fight to the death, I might have made a fool of myself."

Morgana looked up and stroked his cheekbone. "You could never make a fool of yourself, Merlin."

He grinned. "I'm quite good at it, actually, according to Arthur it's the _only_ thing I'm good at."

Morgana didn't smile. "Arthur knows nothing of what you do for him. If he did... you would not be a mere servant boy."

"Being a servant isn't so bad. In fact, it's downright preferable." He kept smiling, cupping her face in a hand, tilting her chin up. "Think about it, I get to do absolutely nothing but get hacked at by training swords, muck out stalls, and polish the prince's royal armor every single day of my existence. What more could I ask for?"

She snorted derisively then. "I'm sure the benefits of being at Arthur's beck and call are overwhelming."

"I hardly know what to do with myself sometimes."

She smiled, the smile she saved just for him, hiding her face against his neckerchief again. She straightened his coat. "I trust the guards didn't see you?" She looked up, standing on her tiptoes, her face inches from his.

Merlin felt the anticipation dissipate. Just to look into her eyes, to be able to be himself, was all he needed to feel secure. He was surprised he was able to gruffly choke out words. "I'm like a wraith in the night. What with Gaius's cooking I'm surprised I've got any substance at all."

She shushed him with her lips, and his heart melted. His every thought, his every heartbeat, was echoed with the sound of her name.

**_XXX_**

It had been going on for some time.

Morgana lay in her soft bed next to her sleeping lover, propped up on an elbow. She would let him sleep a while longer.

For the time being, she would watch him. It was her favorite part of any day. Those arrogant old lords who saw him drop things and trip over himself and whispered about Prince Arthur's manservant had no idea how gentle those hands could be, how lovingly they could hold hers, or how quietly he could tiptoe past her guards. How his goofy smiles and impertinent jokes could make her laugh. How everything that was Merlin seemed wonderful and new to her, something she wanted to clutch to her and never let go. Something she would protect with every ounce of ferocity in her body. And eventually she may need to.

His magic. Not many knew about his magic. Just she, his mother, Gaius, and Lancelot, who was long gone.

_So perfect. _She thought softly to herself, studying the angular details of his still face. The high, slanting cheekbones, splintered with the shadows of his feather-duster eyelashes. The long, straight nose, striking down to the sensuous lips she fantasized about through the day. The dark, hastily chopped hair, curling around his ears and stopping just above his rakish brow. She knew him, every inch of him, just as well as he knew her.

Her magic. She felt it now, slowly growing inside her. She could not tell Merlin about it, not yet. Not when she was so confused about it. She did not want him to see the worst of her, the tangled, vicious part that cried for revenge. And that was the part that fostered her magic.

But here, now, with Merlin, that part of her was silent. Merlin was light, through and through, blinding, shining light that no one else but Gaius and she seemed to see. It was a light that obliterated her darkness.

_"Lady Morgana, I don't-"_

_"Shush, Merlin, please. Answer my question. Say no and I will leave you alone forever, no penalties, no consequences."_

_"... what happens if I say yes?"_

_"Answer the question, Merlin. Do you love me?"_

The fateful night was forever burned into her memory, the night of her salvation. The night of his awakening.

He turned over on his side, one skinny, lean arm draping itself on her waist.

She smiled and kissed the inside of his elbow. Just a few hours more with him.

**_XXX_**

He had loved her almost from the beginning.

How could he not, with those great big beautiful eyes, the flowing waterfall of shining hair, and the eternal sadness and latent fire she refused to let burn? It had been almost instant, his passion for her.

But he hadn't acted, of course. He remained in the shadows, watching her, protecting her. He became her friend, almost her confidante, he liked to think. That was Merlin's way with those he loved, no matter the particular brand of love. He gave of himself and never asked for anything in return. He never forced himself on her, never gave any indication of his feelings, and not just because their respective statuses would never allow them.

Internally, his loyalty to Arthur had warred with his love of Morgana. Of course he never planned to act on these feelings. But still... Morgana was all but promised to Arthur. When the time came for their marriage, it would hurt, but he would be happy for them. Morgana could have the security she deserved, and Arthur would be reasonably pleased.

Nevertheless, a demon on his shoulder whispered to him whenever Arthur was unkind to him or was displeased with Merlin's work. _He doesn't appreciate her the way you do, _the demon said whenever Merlin was on his knees scrubbing a floor he had already scrubbed twice today because Arthur thought it would be funny to track mud in on purpose. _Why does he get to have her just because he's a prince? He doesn't love her, not the way you do. _

But Merlin shook off these thoughts. Arthur was not an unkind prince, even though sometimes it was hard to tell. And he did care about Morgana, and he would take care of her the way she needed to be cared for.

This was Merlin's opinion on the matter, until the night he had delivered her sleeping potion from Gaius. He had knocked brightly on the door, grinning, expecting Guin. They would joke a bit, he would hand her the potion and walk away, leaving her undoubtedly shaking her head at his tomfoolery.

But this time, it was not Guin who opened the door. This time it was Lady Morgana, her creamy skin practically glowing in the torchlight, her glossy hair freshly brushed for bed. She had smiled at Merlin, glancing down at the potion. "Oh, thank you, Merlin. I was getting worried you would forget about me."

Somehow, he had ended up in her room. Somehow, they had begun to talk. And somehow, the fateful question had been offered him.

_"Do you love me, Merlin?"_

Somehow, he had found the courage to say yes.


End file.
